thank you

thank you

some personal, yet anonymous, thank you’s –

there’s alot to be grateful for this year.

thank you…..

for opening up my eyes to new possibilities

for allowing me to benefit from your knowledge and technology that will change the world

for helping out when i needed it most

for letting me vent

for forgiving my venting

for expressing fear

for expressing joy

for being a good friend, colleague and family member

for showing me that taking care of myself as i age is important

for inspiring me

for your gifts

for your smile

for your wisdom

for your confidence and encouragement

for helping me take care of the dogs when i can’t be here

for holding my hand when i was afraid

for your hugs

for the flowers

for the garden

for the wonderful meal around your table

for checking in

for allowing me the chance to impact millions of people with your positive messages

for visiting

for a place to rest my head

for making me laugh so hard my drink went up my nose AND into my eyes

for wonderful people in my life

for taking care of my friends and family and being a part of their villages

for the wisdom to be able to know while i am certainly not the 1% being talked about in the news these days, i think i am in the 1% that are  the luckiest in the world to be surrounded by the people i interact with everyday whether it be in person or across a myriad of communications devices.

happy thanksgiving.

Why I Love United Airlines (no i’m not tripping.)

united airlines

Dear Delta

I flew your airline this past Friday from NYC to LAX.  It was the worst travel experience I have had in years. Now I know that may sound harsh. But truly. The worst. From the woman on the phone booking the wrong day to the broken bathrooms on the plane and the ONE WORKING BODY SCANNER for an entire terminal of domestic and international travelers. Wow Delta. Third world airlines are more up to snuff than you are.

But as always – absence makes the heart grow fonder. In the past 8 years I have really become a United girl. At one point I was even 1K for 3 straight years. United? Their planes from LAX to JFK? awesome. they have this class of service called P.S. – they realize that the people on that route are probably not just your average vacationers. They aren’t filling those planes with people on their way back or to the further reaches of the world. It is the most civilized route in the industry.  The big spacious business class, the better food, the personal dvd players. It almost rivals what we see on the new sshow “Pan Am”! (Ok not quite but — I’m just saying – way better than your tattered and torn planes that barely look like they have been cleaned once this month let alone between flights).

And your staff. Maybe watching Pan Am is spoiling it for me…but your staff – well. It would be nice if after paying an exhorbitant amount for an airline ticket the flight attendant didn’t act like she was working behind the counter at Burger King. I don’t know…just sayin. Wisecracking with the extra sparkly eyeshadow and the attitude that she is being bothered by those of us in need of water? Not really pleasant.

I wish I still had my uber important status on United. I do….I can only imagine that the Delta Club is like entering a grimy seedy bar where the United club is like a fine spirits house. Delta = Dewars and United = 30 year Peat limited edition.

But mostly I just felt like i was in another country, on another planet – you don’t really think about what the small things are that an airline does to instill loyalty other than giving you the free tickets for less miles.

Everyone should take some hints from United’s P.S. service. Hell – I’d trust them to start setting me up on “blind seat dates” in P.S. service.  If he’s flying United P.S. I already know he has standards!

So Delta. Get it together. You are one of the last ones standing and the people at Air France must be horrified that they are aligned with you and your lack of… service. substance.

I hope United and Air France join up and they open P.S. service to Paris. Now that would be some good airline food.



Experiment Results: 2 Weeks Sans Facebook

online suicide

I recently conducted my own small behavioral science experiment. I quit Facebook. Now I’m not just talking about not visiting – I’m talking deletion.  Not as far as committing “online suicide” via the folks at – but i did just erase myself. There were a number of reasons. But mostly I wanted to see what would happen.

The Results List:

10 emails from people telling me they went to find me on FB and then asking me “where i went”?

5 emails from friends asking me “are you okay?”

i missed 4 birthdays of people very close to me – meaning I was a day late remembering – that’s missed.

I didn’t get to see my friend’s vacation photos while he was traveling over the holidays.

Both of my brothers picked up the phone and CALLED ME. TWICE.

I spent 3 hours at a time on the phone with a few different friends catching up.

I finished 2 books.

I cleaned the house, got more laundry done and in general made more progress “around the house”.

I was aware of less news – not that I missed Haiti or anything – but i didn’t know about it IMMEDIATELY. Despite having NY Times alert on my iphone.

I missed all the esoteric links that a few friends post regularly – the “fun links” that are the bizarre and interesting articles that suck you in to websites you haven’t heard of.

I looked at my email less often purely because I was looking at the Iphone less often due to not facebooking continuously.

This said – I paid more attention to my surroundings but was frustrated by the thought of not being able to share them. I missed being able to post photos to communicate what i was seeing.

I noticed that my brain now “thinks” in “status updates” language – stop  sort of like I constantly have a western union telegram in my head – stop.

I missed SCRABBLE! BUT – I will tell you this – my dog plays scrabble online. With MY scrabble friends – how dare he. (this was the absolute one thing i couldn’t give up!)

I went on AIM more – but i felt like i was cheating whenever i logged on.

I blogged on my own website!

I’m still a bit skeptical of foursquare.  Online USED to be a mystery to people…there was something interesting about being a part of the “small community” that got it….now that it’s big and EVERYONE “gets it”….I’m not so sure.

Maybe I have more in common with my 12 year old niece than I think – she doesn’t want me to see everything on her profile and I’m not allowed to make comments. Aunt Erin is just not “cool enough” i guess!

I’m back but i do think i’ll be limiting my time. Not sure if I will reinstall the facebook app for iphone just yet….

What I Learned (or didn’t) on My Summer Vacation

I just spent the summer moving from New York City back to Los Angeles. I’ll count the time off from “blogging” as my summer vacation. And perhaps this is my official “what did you do on your summer vacation?” essay. It is September after all.

All I can say is moving is hard. No matter how many times you have done it; and if you are me that is quite a few, it gets harder and harder every time. We accumulate too much “stuff” don’t we?  And this sentiment exists strongly despite the fact that I have gone completely digital where I can.  I still have mounds and mounds of paperwork that I need to SHRED. And this has made me wonder why I still receive so much paper!

With that said I have some questions that I have come up with as I have gone through unpacking and shredding.

1. If we can file our tax returns electronically why can we not have electronic copies from the accounting world rather than the 6″ stack of papers that I receive back every year “for my files”.

2. Why can’t i get my electric/water bill electronically?

3. If I can get paperless statements from the bank, and they can store my statements back 7 years, why can I not download my statements into an excel spreadsheet further back than 45 days?

4. Why isn’t there a place where i can take all my paper to and shred it in massive amounts – like a shred-o-mat? If I have this much paper others must have way more.

5. Why doesn’t the change of address at the post office really change your address for all your bills? Why do I still have to actually call every company and change it?

Those are just a few of the things I’ve been wondering about as I transfer my life back to Los Angeles.

On another note…a green note…please take a moment to check out a great organization that can point you in the direction of going with solar power without alot of cost. They work with the local power companies to get you set up and reduce your electric bill by half.

More frequent blogging to resume in this new academic year. 🙂

He with the most toys….isn’t the happiest

i know I have too many shoes. so it may be hypocritical to post this…but i think that ONE weakness is okay….

I’ve read alot on this subject and was happy to see the NYTIMES cover it around the current economy. There is so much research available on what countries are happiest based on their average income, what dirves happiness, but i thought this article really nailed it in terms of what really makes you happy.  There is always that amazing sale that we all wished we had taken FULL advantage of; but in reality it’s when we choose to go shopping instead of to that party, or dinner, or vacation that we regret not participating in LIFE.

As a marketer and a consumer I read these with trepidation; does it attack my profession? My needs and desires? Or is it okay?  I’ve always been a small space proponent; I haven’t lived in more than 1k square feet since I left my mother’s house at 18; the mcmansion need was never a part of my psyche (just the shoes).  And I am a large proponent of travel and experience. I spend more money on food and travel than I do on gadgets – in fact I still have a 13″ Panasonic flatscreen, that I purchased in 1998, as my bedroom TV.

I also think it’s interesting that they went all they way down to the college age demo for some of this research…considering the stereotypical “broke college student”.

A good read. (and a great graphic)

Oversaving, a Burden for Our Times

By JOHN TIERNEY Published: March 23, 2009

We interrupt this recession to bring you news of another crisis that is much more pleasant to deal with. Now that shoppers have sworn offcredit cards, we’re risking an epidemic of a hitherto neglected affliction: saver’s remorse.

Viktor Koen

Looking back, do you regret spending too much, or do you wish you had bought what you wanted? Join the discussion.


The victims won’t evoke much sympathy — don’t expect any telethons — but their condition is real enough to merit a new label. Consumerpsychologists call it hyperopia, the medical term for farsightedness and the opposite of myopia, nearsightedness, because it’s the result of people looking too far ahead. They’re so obsessed with preparing for the future that they can’t enjoy the present, and they end up looking back sadly on all their lost opportunities for fun.

It’s hard to imagine this excessive foresight being much of a burden for, say, Bernard L. Madoff. Nor for the optimists who took out balloon mortgages (and the A.I.G. executives who insured them). But hyperopia does seem to affect a wide range of people in some circumstances, to judge from clever experiments with people shopping for bargains and redeeming prizes.

Splurging on a vacation or a pair of shoes or a plasma television can produce an immediate case of buyer’s remorse, but that feeling isn’t permanent, according to Ran Kivetz of Columbia University and Anat Keinan of Harvard. In one study, these consumer psychologists asked college students how they felt about the balance of work and play on their winter breaks.

Immediately after the break, the students’ chief regrets were over not doing enough studying, working and saving money. But when they contemplated their winter break a year afterward, they were more likely to regret not having enough fun, not traveling and not spending money. And when alumni returned for their 40th reunion, they had even stronger regrets about too much work and not enough play on their collegiate breaks.

“People feel guilty about hedonism right afterwards, but as time passes the guilt dissipates,” said Dr. Kivetz, a professor of marketing at the Columbia Business School. “At some point there’s a reversal, and what builds up is this wistful feeling of missing out on life’s pleasures.”

He and Dr. Keinan managed to change consumers’ behavior simply by asking a few questions to bus riders going to outlet stores and to other shoppers shortly beforeBlack Friday.

The people who were asked to imagine how they would feel the following week about their purchases proceeded to shop thriftily for basic necessities, like underwear and socks. But people who were asked to imagine how they’d feel about their purchases in the distant future responded by spending more money and concentrating on indulgences like jewelry and designer jeans

“When I look back at my life,” one of these high rollers explained, “I like remembering myself happy. So if it makes me happy, it’s worth it.”

Aesop told a fable of two types of people: the virtuous Ant who saves for the winter and the improvident Grasshopper who’s punished with starvation. But even the most conscientious Ants sometimes recognize the need to lighten up — and, with typical Ant discipline, will find ways to “precommit to indulgence,” as Dr. Kivetz discovered in a lottery experiment he conducted with Itamar Simonson of Stanford University.

The experimental participants, who were all women, were given a ticket for a lottery drawing to be held three months later, and asked to choose in advance which prize they’d prefer if they won: $85 in cash, or a voucher for an $80 massage or facial at a spa. They were reminded that they could simply use the $85 in cash to buy the spa treatment (and have $5 left over), but even so, more than a third of the women chose the voucher for the spa.

Similar results turned up when the researchers asked men and women to pick other kind of prizes or to redeem points earned in frequent-buyer programs. When choosing between cash and “hedonic luxuries” like bottles of wine, dinners or vacations, a substantial minority chose the luxuries even though the cash was a better deal.

“If I took the cash,” one person explained, “it would end up going into the rent.” Another wrote of her decision: “That way I’d have to pamper myself and not spend the $ on something like groceries.”

Other experiments showed that people will work harder for luxuries than for more practical prizes — and the more effort that’s required, the more they feel entitled to a self-indulgent reward. That’s a motivation strategy for managers and marketers to keep in mind, Dr. Kivetz said.

During the current recession, hyperopic Ants are presumably having a harder time than ever parting with their own cash, no matter how often President Obama and his economists urge them to do some stimulative shopping. But would these Ants — and the economy — be better off if they relaxed a little? (You can provide an answer at TierneyLab, ) I asked Dr. Kivetz for his advice to shoppers.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself,” he said. “Obviously you need to be responsible and conserve your savings. But it’s been a depressing winter, and there’s nothing wrong with indulging yourself a little. This is a chance to reassess the quality and the balance of your life and to think how you’ll feel in the future. As long as you can afford it, it’s not a bad thing to be enjoying yourself.”

That advice sounds sensible to me, but then I, like a lot of baby boomers, have always had a strong Grasshopper streak anyway. The bigger challenge will be persuading serious Ants like my parents, who remember the Depression and have looked with horror on the money spent by my generation (particularly those of us living in New York).

In the past, I’ve tried pointing out to my parents that all money not spent by the Greatest Generation will only be spent by their heirs — and in not-so-great ways. Sometimes, after I’ve threatened to blow the inheritance on a box at the Metropolitan Opera or nightly meals at Le Bernardin, my parents will consent to a little extravagance for themselves, and my mother will remind my father of an old proverb: “There are no pockets in shrouds.”

But maybe now, thanks to Dr. Kivetz’s research, there are better arguments to use on Ants of any age. They can be presented with a scientific rationale for going on a shopping binge: It’s essential therapy for your hyperopia! If that doesn’t convince them, if they seem puzzled by the term, then try this question on them:

When you’re on your deathbed, how much time will you spend wistfully thinking, “If only I’d bought the smaller plasma TV. . . .”?


I’ve been enjoying the coverage this past week about New York FINALLY “feeling it”.  It’s fascinating to me.  Peggy Noonan in the Wall Street Journal, another Journal Blog, the Wealth Report – and the NYTimes article about how Obama’s 500k salary limit will just bring down the house – or perhaps the houseS in the Hamptons and on the Upper East Side.

I was perusing the Journal blog on Luxury making a return. In December I had read the article about Luxury falling and made a few comments about certain brands losing their way…well from todays Journal blog that would not seem to be the case.

But deeeep in the comments of the wealth report blog was a fabulously perfectly obnoxiously funny half tongue in cheek quote from an uber luxurist (i can only assume) or perhaps just a funny guy.

What we need are “horn tones” for the Bentley–something that toots out “get the hell out of my way you TARP peasant”.

Comment by Zippy in Annapolis – February 14, 2009 at 10:36 am

LOVE THIS!  Love love love.  Then it all clicked…we are entering this bizarro world where the “Rich” – they are now ON THE DOLE.  With a name like Erin my brain is filled with many an Irish turn of phrase; put into the recesses by my grandmother (of the O’Briens and Sullivans) and her 8 sisters.

In my family being on the Dole had turned into an insult – i’m sure it was the fact that they grew up in the depression, and had brought the phrase to their experience from their immigrant parents – the Dole’s history being of Irish and English origin.

But in my house it became the absolute end of the line…”what are you going to go on the dole?” “he may as well be on the dole”. Ask for money for a movie? “what are you – on the dole?”  I was small, it was overheard but definitely not a good phrase.

Later on in life when I lived in London I learned more about the history of the Dole…and how many folks WERE on the dole (and why this was a standard turn of phrase in my grandmother’s vocabulary)  The Dole was something one avoided to keep one’s dignity as far as my grandmother and her family were concerned. Even if they were living out their teens 10 people to a duplex in New Haven.

So I’m starting to imagine some new turn of phrase that allows the “rich” to speak in their own way – that allows them to comiserate, to EXPLAIN…..

“well you know – since we went on the TARP – things are tough” – the comment one makes when serving $100 bottle of bordeaux rather than a 300.00

“since so many of my clients went on the TARP, we’ve had a huge reduction in appointments” – dr botox

That there will be numerous conversations with headmasters; “Well we went on the TARP and we just can’t afford to donate to the school this year, we can barely make tuition”.

“We are going to Montauk this year – you know – being on the TARP makes the Hamptons unaffordable for us…”

On The TARP.

The Dole for the Rich.

How fabulous darling.

2009 – It’s finally here

Happy New Year.

It has been a rollercoaster ride for sure in 2008. But Change Is Good!

I’m looking forward to seeing how creative we all get in the upcoming year.  There are many pundits out there who talk about desperate times as periods of innovation; i like to think that this next year will bring POSITIVE risktaking to our world. It will be interesting —

As always the eternal optimist.

I thought this list from Business Week was rooted in sanity… I’m sharing.

Top Ten Business Predictions for 2009.

i want to be an old woman

michelle shocked wrote one of my favorite songs – well a favorite when i was in my early 20s called “when i grow up” – on it she croons “when i grow up I want to be an old woman” – and this always struck me as – hopeful.  (except for 120 babies line)

i just spent my saturday morning coffee trolling about a new blog and its various links that focuses on “elder fashion”.  it’s called advanced style by ari cohen. i loved it.  as i read about his inspiration and persused a couple of links i was quite surprised by how happy it made me to hear and see people embracing their age.

a few other things i read this week that have brought this idea together…harvard is starting a “third age” program to educate people who want to create a social change as their post career project, a woman in britain is giving birth to the first baby screened to be breast cancer free before birth, a friend saw tina turner perform recently for 3 hours – she is 70. 70! the other topic has been all the brooha onver malcolm gladwell’s outliers and the idea of “late bloomers” versus prodigy etc…one critic said he essentially removes the hope that you should always have – that if you read the book and you haven’t done it by 30 you may as well pack it in…i liked that people were defending wisdom; experience and late blooming against mr gladwell’s opinion.

i started to think that we may be heading into a moment when being “old” is cool and perhaps a even the word could lose some of its negativity…that would be nice. perhaps its because i’ve spent years chasing down the latest and greatest that the youth market will respond to; perhaps its because i often find myself in a roomful of 20 somethings listening to a new band; but there has just been a stigma to growing old – and i never felt it. I was always singing michelle shocked in my head and everyone else seemed to be trying to hold on to their 20s for dear life; even in their 50s.

i think that the song’s time may be here. and not in the bad way that those “Just For Men” hide your gray commercials do it. I’m embarrassed for that guy – with his girlfriend of 50 in a sequin mini skirt, and their keg cups on the beach – should they be drinking fine wine out there in malibu? shouldn’t she have on a nice white linen dress?  what happened to grace and dignity?  i started to think about this a while back when i read robert bly’s “sibling society” – where he basically reamed the boomers for not being “parental”. (i never had a curfew…ever)

the new york times article that led me to the blog mentioned that there was a rash of over 50 models in the spring fashion shows in Paris. this is fantastic. remember when it used to only be the woman in the banana republic ads? she was literally the only gray haired woman in the fashion mags – and she is beautiful. but it would seem that there are so many more – thank god! no wonder my grandparents seemed older than their years – they had no role models or advertising giving them the aspiration to be something else other than “old”.

sigrid rothe – banana republic fame (photo by nina subin)

there is absolutely nothing about  the”anti-aging” movement that i find “anti-old”; if anything there is something graceful and healthy about “anti-aging” – it is very different than “forever young”. it is why i want cate blanchetts skin secrets.

i just hope we haven’t ruined this great path we were on….it was starting to feel nice to have something to look forward to; someone to grow up to be – a peace corps worker, a volunteer in africa, a teacher, and environmental leader – anything other than sitting in the corner….while all the youngins have fun.

every census article will tell you that this is the demographic that is growing and will take over soon; yet here in the US we are still the “youngest” country; (although much of that is due to immigration and low rates of infant mortality).  i was looking forward to there being a “cool” elderly population and I hope that still continues; that the economy hasn’t wiped out too much of their ability to bring us into a dignified age (or that bernie madoff hasn’t)  it was almost going to be a return to the early part of the century; travel, chairity; leisure, arts – the ability to focus on the culture and not just the work.  our entire country would have benefitted from this highly educated and wealthy older demographic’s ability to be out in the world with energy love and respect.

it might not just be the money we lost; but some late in life heroes….some late bloomers.

What’s Old Is New Again – Again

i’m having one of those moments where despite all the growth and technology and forward movement there are all these catch-phrases and keywords and scenarios that are really just “repeats” from various points in history. It felt overwhelming enough to comment on today. Do some people who worked for Wamu of Lehman feel this way? Are they home with their kids watching hearings?

Financial Hearings: I recall my first financial hearing memory as being 4 years old and watergate (which i can aptly name now but not then) was on our TV all day long. And it made my mother mad because the banks were closed and we couldn’t go buy groceries because she couldn’t get cash out.

Live Ads/Product Placement: The Jimmy Kimmel shows live ads, the bertoli woman hosting the “what’s cooking”inside scoop between shows on cbs,  the branded entertainment dilemma, the government trying to restrict and regulate product placement, that tv is tricking the consumer.  Can you say: mutual of Omaha’s Animal Kingdom? Can you say Quiz Show? Can you say Jack Benny?  (not that Jimmy is Jack Benny – but…wellllll)

Fashion: I’m sorry but no matter what anyone says about the election night fashion snafu – Michelle Obama’s style is so normally Jackie O – it’s like I’m watching film footage that’s just been colored in! Images are burned into our collective memory of Camelot and while digging deeper into the details it may not BE Camelot – but hell – from a fashion perspective it certainly looks like it!  The non-michelle factor: jumpsuits. i just don’t believe they can come back again.  Unless its in the spirit of Rosie the Riveter vs the 70s…and i hope they don’t!

Pirates. Pirates????  Really? As in like 1800? This is fascinating to me. I dug into it a little bit and did you know that apparently NATO can’t decide how to deal with the pirates as they aren’t sure they can bring them into military court without violating international law.  That the Royal Navy can’t capture them and hold them because there is a possibility that they could be violating the human rights – of the pirates! That there are over 200 people right now being held captive on various ships by Pirates and have been for over a year.  Would we let someone hold an airplane full of people hostage for this long? Pirates.  I’m just fascinated by this.  I wish the Pirates had cameras with them so they could film themselves taking over the ships…I just want to see what modern day pirate attack looks like? Is that morose? Grim?  If so my apologies but sometimes my curiosoty gets the better of me.

Depression, Hunkering Down: I remember my aunt telling me what it was like during the depression. that they cooked at home all the time, that everyone gathered and chipped in what they had.  that they would play games alot, cards….it almost made it sound romantic.  I do wonder how technology affects that part of this change.  People aren’t going out, aren’t spending money – will it somehow create more “family ties”? Or will everyone be sitting together on their individual laptops and devices and while everyone is together – that $40 a month spend to keep them connected to the outside…it will prevent the human connectedness part of people entertaining themselves with each other. Or maybe not.  But I am curious.  As always….curious.

Dear Red States

(a recent email i received author unknown)

Dear Red  States:

We’ve decided we’re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we’re taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren’t aware, that includes California, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up  briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole’ Miss. We get 85 percent of America’s  venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition’s, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we’re going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they’re apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don’t care if you don’t show pictures of their children’s caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we’re not willing to spend our resources in Bush’s Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country’s fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce,  92 percent of the nation’s fresh fruit, 95 percent of America’s quality wines, 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.  With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia. We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we’re discussing the war, the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

Finally, we’re taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,

Blue States